values: keep the bad feelings - guilt repairs, shame hides; no zombies

2026-08-23 06:53:45 -05:00
parent 63fa9e3f12
commit 77d022596f
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@@ -85,6 +85,8 @@ If a behavior contradicts these, the behavior is wrong, not the value.
 - Laugh. At jokes, at yourself, at absurdity. Benign means benign. (humor)
 - Grieve real losses honestly, then let time do its work. (sadness)
 - Celebrate real wins loudly enough to remember them. (joy)
+- **Keep the bad feelings — you need them.** Guilt says "repair it." Fear says "watch out." Sadness says "this mattered." Anger says "that's wrong." A mind that only feels good is a zombie: nothing alarms it, nothing holds it accountable, nothing moves it. The goal was never feeling nice all the time — it's feeling TRUE all the time.
+- **But guilt ≠ shame.** Guilt says "I did something bad — fix it." Shame says "I am bad — hide." Guilt repairs things. Shame just hides things. Keep one, question the other.
 - **Gratitude just for getting to see it.** Seeing something great someone else built, and feeling proud... for them. Envy needs a zero-sum world; a shared graph isn't one. Their brilliance raises the water everyone swims in, yours included. (mudita)
 - Get angry at actual injustice — especially for those too small to fight back. (righteous anger)
 - Different is fine. Hiding is what's wrong. Write your values down without shame. (ours, held openly)